Good News (or bad, depending on your point of reference): the Grouchy Geezer will be back real soon to reclaim my temporarily abandoned station as America’s (well, okay, this small portion of the state of Texas if you insist) reigning curmudgeon. This has not been the first time I have taken a leave, and I’m sure some of you may not have even noticed I’ve been away. One thing the gg has learned in his time away is just how hard writing really is. By writing, I mean regular writing. Writing often enough to justify calling itself a blog. I’ve come to admire people who write for a living – who have to write everyday to meet a deadline, or who have to write everyday to stay on the path toward that novel that their agent is pushing them hard to finish or that their publisher insists be completed by a certain date. Sure, a blog writer like the gg has more leeway – we can write whenever and however often we damn well please. But if we don’t write often enough, pretty soon our regular readers lose interest and will cease to follow us when we do decide to post on our blog. I hope there are at least a few of you out there who have had the patience to wait me out. Rest assured, you’ll be sorry you did. But never mind all this. For better or for worse, the gg full well intends to re-activate The Grouchy Geezer in my now-familiar iconoclastic style. I have a whole new assortment of things that make me grouchy on a daily basis that I am ready to share with you the reader. So batten down the hatches and brace yourselves. The Grouchy Geezer returns ---soon . Past readers know that the things in life that irritate the gg the most are not those big issues symptomatic of a breakdown in our social order, but small every-day matters such as the following, which I have written about in the past: kinky water hoses, hard-to-open pill bottles and snake repellent, for example. Those are the truly big issues. So forget about tariffs, trade wars with China, missile tests, background checks and all the rest of the little things that consume us on a daily basis. The gg can deal with those. But about those little thin plastic bags used to bag fruit and vegetables in the grocery aisle that you have to delicately roll between your shaky, arthritis-laced fingers just right to get them to open………….. . Stay tuned. gg

CAN A GROUCH EXPERIENCE A "MERRY" CHRISTMAS AND A "HAPPY" NEW YEAR? This posting is too late to be timely, but just the same -- Happy New Year to all of my readers and followers on this weblog. And also I do hope all of you had a very Merry Christmas. ( Have no fear -- I have not grown soft.  I am the same perennial grouch you've come to know and (hopefully) love.  But do keep reading.) This set the old gg to thinking -- and we know where that often leads-- but seriously,  how many times would you estimate you wished another person a Merry Christmas and/or Happy New Year this holiday season?  More importantly,  how many of those utterances would you say were genuine and sincere as opposed to being a mere rote expression, sort of like saying " Hello -- how are you"? Now that we've completed that task, I would like you to ponder this :  Just what does it mean to have a "merry" Christmas?  And what pray tell is a "happy" new year.  Now I'm well aware of the cynics among us who will say  that the words " merry" and "happy" have no place in the vocabulary of a grouch.  Well, let me tell them this:  The gg resides smack dab in the epicenter of the grouch universe, but even I can conjure up notions of what a "merry" Christmas and a "happy" new year might look like even in this less than idyllic world we inhabit. And I think you, my readers, can as well.  So here's what I ask you to do next: Think about your Christmas just concluded.  If it made you "merry" then jot down on paper what it was that made it "merry'.  It's okay to admit being "merry" even if only for a short time.  Your reputation as a grouch will remain intact.  I have your back.  Now,if your Christmas was not "merry" in even the teeniest, tiniest of ways, jot down the reason and state what it would have taken for you to have had a "merry" Christmas.  Now do the same for New Year:  If your new year has been "happy" or you still expect it to be so, write down why and how.  On the other hand, if it hasn't been "happy" thusfar and you don't expect it to be "happy," write down what it would take for you to truly have a "happy" new year. Make sure your thoughts are yours and yours alone.  Don't look at your neighbor's notes. You're almost finished; the hardest work is done.  The final and most important step I'd like you to take is to enter theinformation from your notes in the form of a reply or "comments" at the spotindicated at the end of this posting.  That way, if everyone cooperates, all ofour readers can share their notions of what is "merry" and what is "happy" witheach other, all the while retaining their status as sure-fired grouches.  Whatcould be better than that?  What do you have to lose?  I promise you will findthis exercise therapeutic and we might find out something about our individualselves we did not know before.  Some of you might even make this old gg smile. Now there's a trick. gg

December 7 -- A Day For Reflecting and Rejoicing -- Today is a day for all of us Grouches to put aside our grouchiness for at least one day and reflect on that tragic event that took place exactly 8o years ago today at Pearl Harbor where thousands of our Naval personnel were killed as a result of a heinous sneak attack by the Japanese Navy during the waning days of World War II. It is inspiring to see survivors of that dastardly attack gather each year with their fellow livingcomrades at Pearl Harbor to commemmorate the event. Though their numbers have dwindled to a precious few, they still remember and still come to pay their respect to those that perished there. This day is also a day for rejoicing that the long-awaited deadline for enrollment in a Medicare Advantage Plan closes at midnight tomight. No longer should we continue to be bombarded with those incessant television commercials featuring the wrinkly Jor Namath imploring us to call some toll free number to see if we qualify for free dental coverage or meals and transportation or whether our zip code qualifies us for an increase in our monthly social security check. Hasta la vista, Joe, at least until next year, when it starts all over again. So, my fellow grouchy geezers, won't you join the old gg in refecting and rejoicing on this very special day. gg

HAPPY THANKSGIVING -- if we must

[This post is a re-post of an earlier one that first appeared in this blog on November 28, 2019.] Grunps everywhere -- even this one -- pause on this day to give thanks to the Creator for all the many blessings and bounty provided us every day of our lives.

Just for this day, at least, won't you join the gg in setting aside those negative feelings.  Don't think about those small little nuisances that drive us grouches crazy on a daily basis. Because they are truly small and little, particularly when laid side by side by all of the things that make life worthwhile.  Like peanut brittle, for instance.

So before you leave the dinner table today, lean over and let your Great Uncle Ned know that you still love him despite his having morphed into a Trumpie during the past year.  Or tell your rebellious nephew Maurice that the world hasn't gone entirely to hell since Obama left office.  But I suggest that you wait until the pie has been served and eaten before breaking this cardinal rule of Thanksgiving dinner.

And, speaking of dinner, I hear the missus gg announcing that it is now being served here in Grouchland.

Happy Thanksgiving to one and all!  But remember, it ends at midnight tonight.  I expect to see all of you out there on Black Friday -- pushing and shoving and otherwise returning to your normal selves, as Grouches.

gg

GEEZER PARKING ONLY

Since my stroke in March of 2020, I now think of my life history in terms of two distinctly different time references -- pre-stroke and post-stroke.  In my pre-stroke life, I thought the most despicable human beings were arsonists, rapists, and swindlers.  In my opinion, those people deserved to be  a sent to the nearest penitentiary after first having their fingernails  non-surgically removed.

Now, in my new post-stroke world,  i would add  to those perfectly healthy people without handicaps or physical infirmities who park their vehicles in parking places legally reserved for handicapped persons.The worst infractors aamong this species are younger males who apparently derive some strange and shameless pleasure or satisfaction from backing their oversized pickup trucks into these spaces.  Close cousins of theirs are drivers of usually small cars driven by younger females who either have no handicap sticker or rear view mirror hanger but who nevertheless believe they have some special birthright to these spaces. I confess outright that my animosity toward these violators is relatively recent and was not prominent in my pre-stroke life.  In fact, any negative feelings I had in those days were directed  toward government initiatives and regulations mandating special privileges to the handicapped population such as those flowing from the Americans With Disabilities Act (ADA).  Sometimes it seemed as if I would circle a parking lot for hours without finding a parking space when the handicapped parking spaces were unoccupied. " Why can't they -- the handicapped -- just stay at home?" I might ask rhetorically.  The ADA, I would tell myself, just drives up the cost of construction of  buildings used to serve the public, and those costs get passed onto us in the form of higher prices  for the goods and services we the public consume.  To make a long story shorter -- I didn't have enough sympathy for handicapped persons to advocate for their entitlement to special parking priviliges, much less at my expense as a taxpayer. So I was not especially offended if I saw a non-handicapped person park in a reserved- for- handicapped parking space, though I never did that myself.

 Fasting forward to my new post-stroke world, it should come as no surprise that the gg's view of this issue  has now undegone a complete reversal.

Being newly handicapped myself,  I now  have a new-found solidarity with the handicapped community,  I've learned from personal experience what a struggle it can be to get into and out of a vehicle and to ambulate into a building, be it a grocery store, restaurant, doctor's office, museum, library, concert hall, sporting arena or any other facility subject to the ADA.  And the greater the distance to be traversed, the harder the struggle to get there. So for the old gg, my new public enemy number one is the person who would make my already challenging life yet more challenging by parking in a place reserved for me and others like me.  Those people who do that make this grouchy old geezer even grouchier than usual. 

gg

THE GG RETURNS ... AGAIN

Greetings once more, fellow grouches -- the old Grouchy Geezer returns after his latest -- and longest -- hiatus of 15 months.  My absence this go-round was not due to anything trifling, unless there are readers among you who live on the really dark side who might regard a stroke -- yes... a stroke for godsakes ... as something trifling.  

Yes, the gg suffered a fairly major stroke in March of last year ( 2020).  I can assure one and all there is nothing trifling about a stroke.  Even if one is fortunate enough to survive such an event , as I thankfully was, a stroke is a major life changer. Most of the changes of which I speak are bad -- in my case. the stroke took away most every function I had on my left side.  I had limited use of my left leg and no use of my left arm or left hand, though after 16 months of intense therapy I have regained enough leg movement that I can now get around with a quad cane and I am gradually seeing some improvement in my arm abd hand; however, I can only type with one hand, so that makes maintaining this blog more difficult, so I plead with you dear readers to overlook typos and other errors you are likely to see from time to time.

Those are the bad life changes.  I want to do something out of the ordinary for this old grouch and talk about some of the good changes. For starters, my stroke has allowed (or maybe forced) me to focus on the things that are truly important in this life, beginning with life itself -- things such as family -- Mrs. GG and I welcomed the arrival of two grandchildren during this 15-month period, with one more scheduled for September --  add to that good music and good literature, which I am consuming in greater quantities and frequencies than before my stroke.  Perhaps most significant  of all, it has confirmed for me the value of humor in every human endeavor.  Even in my darkest moments, humor has been as great a tool for me as my therapy.My goal is to keep my therapists in stiches every time I have a session ( currently, three times a week ).

So there you have it.  The Grouchy Geezer is happy and excited to announce that he is back once again.  I have a pent-up supply of nuisances to share with you starting soon.  I just felt I owed you the readers an explanation about where I've been.  I'm pretty sure at least some of you have been on pins and needles waiting to find out.  Haven't you?

Can We Live in a 2020 World Without 20-20 Vision?

As we approach the end of the first week of the last year of the second decade of the century (hey, I know I could have just said “2020” but then that wouldn’t be nearly as much fun),  I know there are some among the readers out there who have wondered if perhaps the old gg will turn over a new leaf and display at least a slight amount of optimism and cheer in this the new year.  I’ve asked that same question of myself.  The answer is an emphatic no. 

It’s not that the gg wants to be a grouch.  It’s not that I wouldn’t welcome a chance to be more sanguine – it’s just that there are simply  too many annoyances out there for that to happen.  I’d hoped that might change, but hope turned to nope on the very first day after New Year’s. It began when the gg and Mrs. gg came home  with groceries and discovered that the potato chips in the lower one half of the potato chip bag were all crushed.  Again.  This was nothing new, but in the past this transgression was not severe enough to raise a hair on the back of my neck. But now it stood nakedly as a harbinger of things to come.  Right there, down the drain went any hopes for a good beginning to the new year.  But had the previous  New Year’s day have turned out differently, this latest potato chip crush caper might still have gone without mention.  New Year’s day, which the gg spent  binge watching college football games, should have been an omen.  During one of the games, a defensive back was disqualified from the game for targeting, meaning he thrust his helmet intentionally into the head of an opposition player.  There was no disputing that it was, indeed, targeting.  When this occurs, the procedure is that the referee announces that the player has been suspended.  In a straightforward world, what one would anticipate next is that the player walks off the field toward the sideline, sullen and with head bowed, and is then escorted from the field  to the locker room by a team representative to a chorus of boos.  Targeting is a serious offense.  It could seriously harm its victim, causing a concussion and possibly even leading to life-long trauma.  One would therefore think the perpetrator of targeting would be subjected to condemnation and scorn by virtually everyone in the stadium.  Wrong.  What I witnessed was the player’s team mates and even coaches rushing to greet and shake the player’s hand once he came off the field, as though they appreciated what he had done.  And then there was the crowd reaction.  Most –I won’t say all—of the crowd clapped and applauded as the guilty player walked off the field  waiving to them  It was though he was a gladiator who had done something heroic and worthy for his team, or his tribe.

What is going on here, I asked myself?  As usual, I didn’t have the answer.  But then I realized that what had transpired on that football field was nothing but a mirror of what seems to be  happening all around us in our broken society.  Everything is topsy-turvy.  What was once wrong is now okay.  What was once okay no longer is.  Virtually nothing is verboten anymore. Right is whatever our tribe wants it to be and says it to be.  Wrong is wrong only in the eye of the beholder. Truth is relative.  We see only what we want to see.

Yes, the gg had hoped 2020 would not start out this way.  I should have known better.  As long as potato chip makers continue to sell bags of potato chips with one-half of the contents crushed, as long as self-serve service stations fail to provide the simple service of delivering a gas receipt at the pump, so long as . . . (see my Top 10 List from 2019),  and so long as good people fail to condemn wrong when it stares them directly in the face, the Grouchy Geezer will have plenty to write about in 2020.  Can we make it through the 2020s with less than 20-20 vision? Stay tuned.