Monday, October 19, 2009

If only John Crapper could see this

Missus GG and I stayed at a brand new Drury Inn in San Antonio over the weekend. Whenever I travel, the first thing I check out in a room is the air conditioning and the plumbing fixtures so I will know how to use them. The john in our bathroom was unlike anything anything I've ever seen. I know the john-makers are doing everything possible to help us conserve water, but this one was over the top. Instead of the usual flush handle, it had two buttons, one marked "Liquid" and the other marked "Solid". I guess that's self-explanatory. But I couldn't help wondering what button, if any, one should push if one was afflicted with, say, diarrhea. Or if one were to confuse "liquid" with "solid" what the result would be, e.g., would the toilet police come to the door? I wondered what John Crapper would think about this latest tweak to his invention. I wonder if it would make him grouchy as it did me?

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Welcome, fellow grouches. Come in, put on a frown and make yourselves at home. According to my family and friends, I've been a grouch for quite some time. I turned 65 a couple of years ago so now not only am I a grouch but an official geezer to boot. A Grouchy Geezer! (But truth be known, I'm a grouch only on days ending in a "Y").

My purpose here is to share some of the things I've observed and experienced over the course of my life that have peeved, annoyed and irritated the crap out of me. Things that helped make me into The Grouchy Geezer. As fellow grouches, I feel sure you, too, have encountered similar things in your lives that have peeved, annoyed and irritated the crap out of you as well. If so, you'll have the chance to share them on this site.

The format is simple. From time to time I will post a pet peeve based on a particular life experience or observation or something currently in the news or in the culture that makes me grouchy.

This will be a free and open board and anyone is welcome to comment. You may comment on my peeve or relate one of your own. Any topic is fair game as long as it is something that makes you grouchy. The only requirement is that you use good taste and refrain from personal attacks. Use of profanity will make me even grouchier and bar you from further access to the site. That means you will have to grouch to your wife, not on here.

None of this is to say that uplifting banter is not encouraged. By all means, if you have something to say that is inspiring or that might force other readers to have to suppress a smile, let us hear it. But don't overdo it; after all, it's our grouchiness that defines and unites us and makes this blog possible.

GG