Friday, August 30, 2019

WHEN IS A TENNIS SHOE NOT A TENNIS SHOE?



The gg set out this morning to do something I haven’t done in years – to buy myself a new pair of “tennis” shoes.  Now as most everyone who has bought any kind of athletic shoe or “sneaker” within the past 50 years must surely know by now, what used to truly be a tennis shoe – meaning it was intended for use in playing tennis – has long since become a generic term for any kind of athletic shoe or sneaker.  Very few  people actually play tennis and therefore when they go to buy athletic shoes, they rarely do so for the purpose of playing tennis.  So the tennis shoe now belongs in the same generic capacity as the Xerox machine (copiers and printers) and the Kelvinator (the gg’s grandmother, like others of her era, referred to her GE refrigerator as the “Kelvinator”)  and the “Coke date”.  But if the gg were to take a  poll of my readers, I’d bet at least half would admit to shopping for tennis shoes when what they are truly interested in are shoes for running or jogging  or some other use.

The gg remembers when the market for tennis shoes was limited to the old Converse canvas shoes.  They came in black, white or red, and in high top or low top. (These shoes have made a comeback recently and have become a fashion staple for girls.)  And then there were the rivals,  PF Flyers and US Keds.  And that was it. Over the course of my  growing up years,  I owned all three from time to time, but I remember the Converse’s the best.  I and all of my classmates who also had Converse’s would wear them to school every day and on weekends.  We’d wear them for every activity we participated in, whether softball, football, basketball, hunting, fishing, marbles or just hanging out.  Years later, when I actually began to play tennis seriously, I was able to save enough money to buy myself a pair of Fred Perry canvas tennis shoes (white of course) and later a pair of Adidas Stan Smith leather tennis shoes (also white).  In those days, every thing about tennis was white.

Now fast forward to this morning and the gg’s trip to the local sporting goods store.  There was a whole section of the store devoted to athletic and outdoor shoes, for both men and women.  I was at once  amazed and overwhelmed by the sheer number of shoes on display.  And not just the number but the variety, as it seemed there was a shoe for every athletic function known to man (or woman).  Upon entering the store, I was asked what I was there for and, of course, I said “tennis shoes.”  The greeter was an older gentlemen, so he smiled and winked, knowing and understanding that I was not looking for a shoe in which to play tennis, but more likely for walking or simply casual wear.  I followed his direction to the big sign that said “Shoes.”  The first thing I noticed was sign on each section of shelving describing the type of shoe on that particular shelf.  The signs included these, each having its own shelf with boxes of the shoes underneath the displayed shoes in the various sizes:  “Running shoes, Training Shoes, Walking Shoes, Outdoor shoes, Hiking Shoes, Casual shoes, Sandals, Lifestyle shoes.  (I asked what “Lifestyle” shoes were and was told that it was shoes that were designed to look pretty much like athletic shoes but were intended to be worn for casual occasions where no athletic activity was intended.  The gg took this to mean such things as  lounging around the pool at the country club.  Continuing, I saw signs for “Boating shoes, Water shoes, Volleyball shoes and Skateboarding shoes.”  It’s a good thing the gg didn’t go there to buy an actual pair of tennis shoes because there was no sign for “tennis shoes.”  It seemed to the gg that there was  a shoe made especially to be worn for any and every type of physical activity known to man.  And there must be well over 10 manufacturers competing with each other to sell all these “tennis shoes” to the public.  These included Nike, Adidas, Asics, Brooks, Reebok, Merrill, New Balance, , Puma, Saucony, Skechers, Sperry,  and Timberland.

The gg has decided that the manufacturers of these various tennis shoes are marketing geniuses.  They have convinced us, the consuming public, that when we want to walk, we need to buy and wear a pair of walking shoes; that if we want to then run, we need to stop and exchange our walking shoes for our pair of running shoes; and if we want to venture off the jogging trail onto a wooded path through the woods, we need to stop once more and change into our outdoor or hiking shoes.  Then if should come upon a body of water with a dock, we need yet once  more change into our boat shoes or our water shoes (if we want to go into the water).  Then of course if we should want to play volleyball or go skateboarding or engage in any other kind of athletic or other physical activity, we should put on our shoes designed for that particular activity.  It’s no wonder these shoes are  nicknamed “Sneakers” – these shoemakers sneak the money right out of our wallets and purses to buy a separate pair of shoes for each activity. 


But they forgot one thing:  What about the legions of us geezers out here who no longer choose or are no longer able to participate in any of those activities for which the shoes are made.  In the gg’s case, I’m waiting for them to come up with a “Netflix Binge Watching Shoe” or a “Chess Shoe” that one would wear for playing chess.  Or how about a “Snooze  shoe” for wearing while stretched out for a nap in one’s living room recliner?  The gg misses the old days when his trusted Converse high-tops answered the call for just about every sport or activity  or non-activity I wished to engage in – even tennis.  Speaking of tennis, It’s a good thing the gg didn’t go in that store to buy a pair of actual tennis shoes.  There were none so labeled or to be found.  And by now you know what that makes the gg.  Grouchy, yes.

gg

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Welcome, fellow grouches. Come in, put on a frown and make yourselves at home. According to my family and friends, I've been a grouch for quite some time. I turned 65 a couple of years ago so now not only am I a grouch but an official geezer to boot. A Grouchy Geezer! (But truth be known, I'm a grouch only on days ending in a "Y").

My purpose here is to share some of the things I've observed and experienced over the course of my life that have peeved, annoyed and irritated the crap out of me. Things that helped make me into The Grouchy Geezer. As fellow grouches, I feel sure you, too, have encountered similar things in your lives that have peeved, annoyed and irritated the crap out of you as well. If so, you'll have the chance to share them on this site.

The format is simple. From time to time I will post a pet peeve based on a particular life experience or observation or something currently in the news or in the culture that makes me grouchy.

This will be a free and open board and anyone is welcome to comment. You may comment on my peeve or relate one of your own. Any topic is fair game as long as it is something that makes you grouchy. The only requirement is that you use good taste and refrain from personal attacks. Use of profanity will make me even grouchier and bar you from further access to the site. That means you will have to grouch to your wife, not on here.

None of this is to say that uplifting banter is not encouraged. By all means, if you have something to say that is inspiring or that might force other readers to have to suppress a smile, let us hear it. But don't overdo it; after all, it's our grouchiness that defines and unites us and makes this blog possible.

GG